Imagine surviving “the Great Depression, the Second World War, the Civil Rights Movement”, and ultimately seeing the first African-American president of the USA. They even received a letter of praise from President Obama in 2010!
The Guinness World Record for the longest marriage was broken by Zelmyra and Herbert Fisher. Having been wed since May 13, 1924. With 84 years together, they previously broke the record for the oldest marriage.
In the environment we live in today, it seems hard to accomplish this. Most marriages break up even before they start! According to research, first marriages end in divorce at a rate of 41%, “second marriages at a rate of 60%, and third marriages at a rate of 73%”. So how did this couple manage to stay together for so long and set a record? What is their trick?
They were questioned regarding their strategies for enduring difficult times and handling marital issues. Here are the straightforward responses from the couple who actually lived together until “death did them part”:
How did you come to the conclusion that you could live your life together?
Did you experience any fear? As the days went by, our bond grew stronger and more stable. Never once was divorce a possibility or even an idea.
How did you know your spouse was the one you were meant to be with?
Before being married, we were great friends because we shared a childhood. While a buddy is for life, our marriage lasted forever.
- After been married for more than 80 years, is there anything you would do differently?
We wouldn’t alter anything in the least. Our marriage is not a secret; we simply did what was necessary for our family and ourselves. (I think that’s where the secret is…)
- How would you counsel someone who is clinging to the hope that Mr. Right is truly waiting for them?
Zelmyra: Mine was only a few steps away! Keep the faith because he is never too far away; when you meet him, you’ll know for sure.
- What marriage advice did you ever receive that you felt was the best?
Respect each other, assist one another, and interact. Be loyal, truthful, and honest. Love one another from the bottom of your hearts.
- What qualities make a good partner the most important?
Zelmyra: A diligent worker and responsible parent. The 1920s were challenging, but Herbert wanted the best for us and gave it to us. I wed a decent man.
Which Valentine’s Day memory is your favourite?
Zelmyra: I always make dinner. Herbert surprised me by cooking dinner for me when he left work early. He cooks quite well! Herbert: I told her she could unwind since I was making dinner for her. My day was made by the smile on her face and the empty plate! (This has brightened my day!)
- You were married at a young age; how did you two manage to develop as individuals while remaining a unit?
Everyone who sows a seed and reaps a crop joins in the celebration. Even though everyone of us is unique, together we can do more.
- Which of your 85 years of marriage is your favourite memory?
Five children, ten grandchildren, nine great-grandchildren, and one great-great-grandchild make up our heritage.
Do communication skills improve with time?
How do you maintain your composure? Now that the kids are older, we talk more. We can spend time together relaxing in our rocking rockers or on the porch.
- How did you handle having to be physically apart for an extended period of time?
Herbert: When Z was admitted to the hospital with our fifth kid, we were apart for two months. The most trying time of my life was then. Without Zelmyra’s mother’s assistance, I would have gone insane trying to take care of the house and the other kids.
What is the most crucial thing to remember at the end of a poor relationship day?
Keep in mind that marriage is not a game; never keep score. God has combined the two of you to form a winning team.
- How significant is combat?
physically never! Accept that it’s acceptable to differ and stand up for what actually counts. Discover how to bend, not shatter!
- What is the defining characteristic you share with everyone else?
We both consider God to be real and are Christians. A commitment to the Lord is marriage. Every day, we pray together and for one another.
We are fortunate to have Zelmyra and Herbert’s marriage counsel because they had an amazing union. It was evident that they were still much in love 87 years after getting married.
Zelmyra also passed away at 105 years old in 2013, a few years after Herbert, who died in 2011 at the age of 105. The couple had been wed for 87 years when Herbert passed away.
Lifelong commitment is difficult, but it is possible! Every bit of assistance and guidance is welcome! Please share some of this insightful love advise with your friends on social media if you find any of it to be meaningful. It ought to be common knowledge!