He possessed an artificial limb, an eyepatch, and a hook for a hand. The bartender was interested. “How did you get that wooden leg?” he inquired.
The pirate drank some brew. “It was a dreadful naval conflict. I stood courageously in front of twelve cannons.They only managed to strike my limb.” The bartender questioned, “What about your hook?”

The pirate took a second lengthy drink. “I was captured by the British navy on that day. They bound me to the mast, and I escaped by biting off my own hand. The bartender’s skepticism increased. “And how did you get that eyepatch?” The pirate took a second drink. “There was insurrection. My own crew abandoned me on a desolate island. But I was fearless. I laid down in the dunes in order to await rescue. A seagull flew over and defecated in my eye as I glanced up.” The bartender responded, “That’s absurd, nobody loses an eye from bird poop.” The pirate drank his ale in one swallow and grimaced as he did so. It was the first day of having a hook.