Meg Tilly Traded Red Carpets for Pancake Mornings with Her Kids — At 65, She’s a Writer Living a Quiet Life
There was a time when she was so loved and crowded with admirers that she couldn’t even use the lavatory without someone placing an autograph request beneath the door. However, adored actress Meg Tilly left it all while she was at the top of her game. The Oscar-nominated 1980s star, who is now 65, has chosen to live a quiet, solitary life for herself and her kids.
Hollywood was astonished when Meg Tilly decided to turn her back on fame in her early thirties. Her roles in “The Big Chill,” “Leaving Normal,” and the eerie “Agnes of God,” for which she was nominated for an Academy Award in 1985 for Best Supporting Actress, had her on a high at the time.
However, Tilly was focused on her children, who were far more valuable than golden statuettes. Determined to raise her three children in a normal and loving environment, she fled the bright lights of Los Angeles for a simple life in Canada.
In a 2017 interview, she clarified, “I would always take my children with me when I went on movies.” “For a few years, that was incredibly effective. However, after we returned from the filming of “Leaving Normal” one year, my daughter’s best friend had made friends with someone else. She was heartbroken.
The Actress’s Decision Was Made Clearer by a Child’s Heartbreak
For the loyal mother, everything came to a head in that one heartbreaking moment when a young girl lost her best friend due to absence.
“I couldn’t be away from my kids’ lives for six to nine months. “I didn’t feel like I could trust anybody else to raise them because I had a difficult childhood,” she disclosed. “My kids didn’t request their birth. It was my duty to be present. Her choice was irrevocable. She prioritized her family. Always.
But she was being pulled away by more than just parenthood. Her spirit was worn down by the unsightly side of Hollywood behind the scenes. Tilly was open about how uncomfortable it was for her as a woman in a field that frequently treated actors like prey.
Dealing with the many personalities and having to collaborate with people after saying, ‘No, I’m sorry, I really don’t want to,’ was difficult. Then they would continue to pressure you because they wanted to win the girl,” Tilly said.
8×10 Glossies, a bathroom stall, and a girdle—fame at its most ridiculous
For Tilly, being famous was not just draining, but frequently completely ridiculous. After spending hours in a confining girdle on location, she was in a desperate rush to the restroom while filming “The Two Jakes” with Jack Nicholson.
There were no restrooms in the area, and it was already urgent when she was eventually granted permission to leave. However, privacy was unattainable even in that precarious situation.
She was struggling to get out of the girdle behind a stall door when a fan started banging loudly and then pushed a Sharpie and eight-by-ten glossies under the stall to get an autograph.
“‘Not while I’m using the restroom,’ I said. It was awful. Thus, fame isn’t always wonderful,” she explained. As a warning that celebrity isn’t always as glamorous as it seems, she frequently shares the experience with young people who aspire to be famous.
When Tilly returned to Canada, she changed rather than merely retreated. With the same fervor she formerly devoted to the film, she immersed herself into parenting.
“You believe that the world’s problems can be resolved by simply making a large stack of pancakes,” my daughter once said to me. And I did! She remembered having a delicious breakfast every morning and the hot cookies after school. “All I wanted to do was be a ‘Leave It to Beaver’ mother. I was merely attempting to love them as best I could.
The Delightful Escape: From Cookie Jars to Oscar Night
Did her kids know that their mother, a former Hollywood star, sacrificed everything for them? However, Tilly says the answer isn’t so simple.
Will, Emily, and David, her three children, were mostly insulated from her notoriety. Will, her son with Colin Firth, grew up unaware of his mother’s past as a star, but Emily and David, who were married to producer Tim Zinneman, had a taste of her career.
“My eldest daughter did because she would appear on sets, or we would have complimentary tickets to Cirque du Soleil, and so on. But Will, my youngest kid, didn’t know,” Tilly clarified. He would accompany his father on scenes and was aware of his notoriety. However, I was only a mother. In fact, I made it a rule that no one could view my belongings until they were eighteen.
A Hollywood Love Story in Canada’s Wilds
On the set of “Valmont” in 1989, Tilly got to know Will’s father. The passion was intense and the chemistry was immediate. With her two small children, they withdrew to a peaceful house close to Vancouver, where they soon welcomed Will. However, the fairy story came to an end five years later, and Firth returned to England, where he became famous.
She remarked, “I always knew he was so talented,” “I believe that’s a contributing factor in my affection for him. I simply knew that he was gifted, while everyone else was not. When we first met, I was a very well-known figure, but he was just getting started.
A Short Comeback to the Public Eye, Initiated by Sisterly Love
After a number of years, Tilly returned to acting when her kids were older. She was encouraged to do so by her sister, actress Jennifer Tilly, who gave her a bracelet that read, “It’s never too late to be what you might have been.”
Starring in “Bomb Girls” and “War Machine” with Brad Pitt, Tilly was encouraged to do so. She was surprised by the response she got when she starred beside Pitt in the gloomy military parody.
Women in the audience were coming up to her throughout the screening to express how much they enjoyed seeing a wife character that appeared to be the lead’s real wife. She was “actually older” than her well-known co-star, Tilly said with amusement.
The number of people who brought it up astounded her. She recalls, “I must have heard it fifty times.” It was a heartfelt moment of unanticipated gratitude that reminded her that her presence still had significance. The answer was kind and sincere.
Tilly’s Second Act: From Movie Star to Island Novelist
Even if she has returned to acting on occasion in a few roles, Tilly would never be a fan of performing again. She and her spouse, writer Don Calame, had been residing on a secluded island off the coast of Vancouver for almost two decades by 2017.
She poured her heart and soul into writing novels there, ranging from playful romance to dark, healing tales like “Gemma” (influenced by her own traumatic background).
“I’m really proud of [Gemma], of being brave and standing tall in my truth,” she stated at the time. “I’m proud of being a voice for people who don’t have one, and letting them know they aren’t alone.”
Even though she led a solitary life, she was recognized nonetheless. “I’m surprised that people always know me because I’m so much older. “Oh, my husband is going to be so jealous—he had the biggest crush on you in ‘The Big Chill!'” she said, referring to the instances when women approached her.
“I think, well, if he saw me now,” she said in jest. I’m a matron! I’m a woman in my middle years. It’s still fantastic, though. Even yet, it surprises me. She shines even when she is not in the spotlight.
Tilly is still living in peaceful seclusion at the age of 65 in 2025. Her heart is still anchored in the tranquil life she established for herself decades ago, even though she periodically makes a comeback to the screen, such as in the popular TV series “Chucky” in 2022.
“I’m not career-building,” she stated in a 2017 interview with People magazine. “All I want is my life. My life is wonderful. I am quite fortunate. I have experienced many periods of dissatisfaction with my life. Although there have been difficult moments, I now feel incredibly fortunate.
