Parenting Lessons: How I Changed My Husband’s Tune from Headphones to Helping

My Husband Refuses to Help with Our Crying Baby at Night, Puts on Headphones & Listens to Calming Music – I Taught Him a Lesson

With a teething infant and a demanding work, Scarlett is at her wits’ end, while her husband Dave sleeps soundly thanks to noise-canceling headphones. After he rejects her cries for assistance, Scarlett devises a crafty scheme to force him to go through her nightmares.

I have something to rant about.

I’m Scarlett, and I’ve been with Dave for twenty-five years. Our three children are a twelve-year-old soccer enthusiast, an eight-year-old budding astronaut, and Lily, our six-month-old new baby.

Don’t get me wrong, I adore my children, but parenting small people while juggling a hard work is no joke.

I used to be this super couple with Dave. However, dad has been evading his fair part of midnight infant chores lately.

Imagine this: At two in the morning, my crying, teething baby is in my arms as I pace the room with noise-canceling headphones on and some damn soothing music—ocean waves, maybe? It enrages me!

This is the setup, then. That evening was one of those. Lily was a distressed teething child. I had exhausted every possibility: rocking, feeding, lullabying. Nothing was successful. I woke Dave up, exhausted and at my wits’ end.

“Dave, please assist me. Lily has been weeping for hours,” I said, my frustration hardly disguised in my voice.

With a moan, he removed his headphones. “I have to get up early, Scarlett. My work is hard. Not able to take it?”

“Seriously, Dave?” I lost my temper, my eyes stinging hot with tears. “I’ve been taking care of it all evening. Here’s where I need some help.”

He averted his gaze and rolled his eyes. “I must get some rest. If I’m tired, I can’t work at my job.”

And that was all. the critical moment. He said something that hurt more than it should have. It felt like he was floating by, without caring that I was drowning. There has to be a change. I could not bear to be so unappreciated and isolated.

That’s when my scheme came to me.

Not that I’m proud of it, but in desperate circumstances, extreme means are necessary. I made the decision to alter his priceless headphones by adding a concealed speaker that I could control with my phone. Yes, it was sly, but I really wanted him to know how hard I was trying.

I experienced a mixture of eagerness and remorse on the first night of my plan. After putting Lily in her crib, I bided my time until Dave nodded out. Lily woke up crying, so I carried out my plan.

I turned on the speaker. His headphones were filled with a baby’s cries. He jumped up, agitated and perplexed.

His eyes rubbed, “Scarlett, did you hear that?” he muttered.

“Hear what?” I said, pretending not to know.

Shaking his head, he staggered toward Lily’s crib.

Half-amused, half-guilty, I watched as he attempted to calm her. Thoughtless as he was, at least he was trying.

I became inventive for the next few evenings. I mimicked the sounds of a door creaking, a mosquito buzzing, and even his boss’s monotonous voice talking about quarterly reports.

Dave became more irate. His performance at work began to suffer as a result of his sleep deprivation. He was tense and abrasive, but he was still failing to make the connection.

I played the sound of a fire alarm one really difficult night, and Dave sat up, wide-eyed and panicked.

He yelled, “What is going on?!” as he looked around the room puzzled.

I smirked and replied, “Dave, relax.” It’s only Lily. Would you perhaps check up on her?”

He gave me a frown and got out of bed with reluctance. I could see the bags under his eyes as he took Lily up, and my own fatigue was beginning to show.

Even if it was a minor triumph, it was nevertheless a victory.

I played a voice recording of his supervisor, Mr. Thompson, giving him a harsh lecture about missing deadlines on the fourth night of my plan. Dave sprung to attention, appearing truly frightened.

“Scarlett, what’s going on? Have you heard that? It had a Mr. Thompson-like voice.” For the first time, I noticed a break in his cool veneer as he began to perspire.

“Dave, I believe you’re simply overly anxious,” I said in a composed manner. “Perhaps you ought to assist Lily more frequently. It may improve your quality of sleep.”

I could see the wheels moving in his head as he fixed me with a look.

He said, “Yeah, maybe,” but there was still uncertainty.

Dave was a mess by the end of the week.

His patience wearing thin, he was snapping at the children.

“Scarlett, I’m not sure what’s going on, but I’m at my breaking point. I’m tired and I’m hearing things.”

I bit my lip, simultaneously gratifying and feeling guilty.

I said, “Dave, we need to talk,” in a steady voice that was heavy with the previous few nights’ worth of stress.

With bloodshot and tired eyes, he glanced at me. “What is it? Tell me, please.”

I persuaded her to sit down, pointing to the couch.

He rubbed his temples and sagged into the chair. I inhaled deeply, prepared to spill the beans.

“Those noises you’ve been hearing, Dave? The fire alarm, the mosquito, and the sobbing infant were all made-up. “I have been listening to them using your headphones,” I admitted, my heart racing.

His eyes went from wide with disbelief to narrow with rage.

“You carried out this? Why on earth would you act in such way?

“Because I’m drowning here!” With a broken voice, I fired back. “Each night, while you sleep through it all, I stay up with Lily and attempt to calm her. Dave, I feel so alone. I needed you to know how I feel about it.”

His hands were squeezed into fists as he stood up. “You’ve chosen to torment me, then? Scarlett, what kind of perverted reasoning is that?

Drops of tears ran down my cheeks. “I had run out of options. I’m worn out too. You have to understand how difficult this is for me. I needed you to be my partner, not just a support system when times are hard.”

He merely looked at me for a while, a mixture of astonishment and rage on his face. Gradually, the fury subsided and was replaced by a more kind emotion.

“I apologize to Scarlett. I’ve been living a very alone life. I had no idea how difficult things were for you.”

Nodding, I wiped away my tears. “I felt desperate, but I’m not suggesting it was the proper thing to do. Dave, I need you. We must work as a unit for me.”

With a groan, he combed through his hair. “Now now I understand. I’ve been conceited. I apologize.

That was the first time in a long time that Dave stayed up with me voluntarily. Lily was rocked, her diaper changed, and he even got her to laugh.

It felt as though a burden had been removed from me. I was no longer by myself.

Over the next few days, Dave got increasingly involved. He began rotating who took care of the infant at night. We spent peaceful times together, whispering discussions, and sharing late-night meals.

Our bond started to mend and grow stronger.

One evening, when we were both tired but happy in bed, I said in a hushed voice, “Thank you, Dave.”

Grinning, he hugged me tightly. “No, Scarlett. I appreciate you waking me up.”

We could see the shift in our home dynamics. Dave showed the children more patience, and they were happy to see him get more involved. Our shared obligations and laughing filled our evenings, which was a far cry from the loneliness I’d experienced previously.

Dave glanced at me during one of those late-night feedings, as we sat in Lily’s nursery’s faint light.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said,” he added. Regarding collaboration. I want to confirm that you and I have my full support. I apologize for not doing my fair part of the work.”

I extended my hand and gripped his hand. “Thanks for that, Dave. It has great significance. It’s about supporting one another during difficult times.”

With a resolute expression, he gave a nod. “I commit to ensuring a fair distribution of parental responsibilities going forward. You won’t be on your own when doing this.

Our relationship became closer every day. We managed to find a rhythm and balance that satisfied us. With Dave by my side, the late hours didn’t seem as intimidating, and sharing the weight of our burdens made them feel less heavy.

One quiet night, after a particularly quiet evening when Lily had finally fallen asleep, we both felt completely worn out when we went into bed. Dave drew me in and put his arm around me.

“Scarlett,” he said in a modest, appreciative voice, “thank you.”

I grinned as a wave of satisfaction passed over me. “Thank you, Dave,” I replied in a whisper. “For being my partner.”

I experienced a profound sense of calm as we fell asleep. The key difference was that we were in this together, really together.