“Forbidden to Wear Makeup, She Grew Up Feeling Unseen — Until the World Saw Her”

Her Parents Forbade Her From Using Makeup & She Never Considered Herself Attractive — Today, She’s Admired by Thousands

She never thought of herself as attractive and her parents forbade her from wearing makeup, but now thousands of people admire her.

In order to have a place to sleep, she worked for years ironing performers’ shirts between performances. She sometimes walked kilometers to get to auditions and couldn’t even buy a train token. Her adventure started backstage, off-script, and far away from the spotlight rather than in front of the camera.

She was not raised on beauty regimens or receiving praise for her looks. Anything that suggested vanity was subtly suppressed in her home, where discipline and modesty were valued above all else.

Words like “pretty” were not part of the family’s language, and makeup was forbidden.

She continued to focus on the work rather than how she was seen, even as she sought performance. She would go on to become one of the most respected female professionals in her industry. She grew up in a home in Charleston, West Virginia, where discipline and modesty influenced every aspect of daily life.

Her mother, Patricia, taught English, while her father, Billy Jack, worked as a chemical engineer. Together, they established precise standards for behavior and appearance, instilling strong values in their three girls. Manicures, piercings, and makeup were forbidden.

“We couldn’t have layers in our hair, perms, or color,” she said. Being wholesome, not trendy, was the focus. The family didn’t object to her father’s belief that such things weren’t suitable for young girls.

The topic of appearance was just not discussed, and there was no pressure to live up to beauty ideals. “I don’t think my parents ever said ‘You’re pretty,” she said. In their household, the emphasis remained on hard work, responsibility, and academics.

She learned to prioritize constancy and modesty over appearance or fashion, as did her sisters, Melissa and Susannah. That perspective was also greatly influenced by their mother, who purposefully avoided elevating beauty above all else.

“It was a shock when I got to college to hear people say I was pretty,” she recalled. Comparisons, however, were inevitable even in a household that opposed vanity. It became evident as she approached adolescence that she was not the center of attention most of the time.

She frequently thought that her older sister Melissa, who was renowned for being exceptionally good at everything, eclipsed her during her adolescent years.

Melissa graduated with a flawless academic record, won state math competitions on a regular basis, and was well-liked for her looks in addition to being a school leader.

In contrast, she didn’t think she belonged in any of those groups. It took her a long time to grow into her face, she later remarked. She avoided the types of insecurities typical of her contemporaries because beauty was not a component of her upbringing or self-image.

She acknowledged that she had secretly put on cosmetics during homeroom. She participated in school and community theatrical productions, which is where she first encountered makeup.

She frequently applied thick foundation because she thought that theatrical cosmetics would make her seem acceptable offstage.

In addition, she accentuated her blush without realizing how strange it appeared in social situations. She would feel ashamed when she looked at pictures from that era years later.

According to her, her face appeared strangely pale in those photos, with excessively drawn-on features that gave her a character-like appearance rather than a young one.

The stage provided her with clarity even as she battled to find her feet with her appearance. Even when her self-image failed to guide her, performance did. She developed an early interest in performing. She studied ballet for nine years because she liked dancing as a child.

Motivated more by self-control than innate talent, she frequently exercised for up to six hours every day. She enjoyed being on stage even if she didn’t think she was very talented. She was studying chemistry when she started college, but after reading the play “Crimes of the Heart,” her academic focus completely altered.

She changed to drama as her major. Her father was concerned that she would have financial difficulties, but he never ordered her not to do it, according to her mother. “I think my husband worried that she would be poor her whole life,

but bless his heart, he never told her not to do it,” the actress’s mother recounted.

She worked several jobs during her time in college to help pay her bills. She was a babysitter and worked at a men’s clothes store. She worked, frequently unpaid, in regional theater throughout the summers. She assisted with set construction and restroom cleaning at one summer stock program.

Although those early theatrical positions weren’t particularly glamorous, they allowed her to get personal knowledge of every facet of stage production.

She carried on with this employment after graduating, performing in a musical at the Georgia Shakespeare Festival before it was moved to a theater in a Florida strip mall.

She was not making enough money to support herself, and she was unable to take on outside work because she was not an equity actor. She promised to assist in any way she could when the theater owner inquired about her management strategy.

She said, “I can do laundry,” In return for her washing and ironing 35 cast members’ shirts eight times a week in between shows, he allowed her to remain in shared housing.

It kept her afloat, but it wasn’t glamorous. With little money, no safety net, and no plan other than to keep going and try out for the Utah Shakespeare Festival, she set her sights on New York City after the Florida run was over. She responded to a bulletin board ad at the Actors’ Equity office and found a place to stay.

She ended herself sleeping on a futon she had brought in her bag and living on the kitchen floor of a stranger’s residence. She spent nine months there. She walked miles across the city to attend auditions since she couldn’t afford subway tickets.

She distributed headshots and introduced herself to everyone who would listen, landing three jobs on her first day in New York. “I believe I said hello and introduced myself as Jen as soon as I went in. “I like to act, and I’m from West Virginia,” she remembered.

She made roughly $150 a week at the time, which was barely enough to get by.

She frequently lived without basic luxuries and lacked the flexibility to work in restaurants like other aspiring performers. She didn’t moan, though. In retrospect, she remarked that she was fortunate not to obstruct herself and that she readily embraced the challenges.

Despite her precarious living situation and meager income, she remained resolute. Her perseverance soon paid off, as little jobs started to lead to bigger opportunities.

It was in 1998 that she got her first significant break, appearing in three episodes of “Felicity.”

Although it wasn’t a leading role, it did give her exposure and screen time. She then began to take on more steady employment, which eventually led to bigger projects. Her perception of herself had not changed much while her profession was beginning to take shape.

She still didn’t think she was attractive, and she didn’t think anyone else would. That made a certain college moment memorable. She was traversing the quad at Denison University during her freshman year when a student stopped her and informed her that the seniors found her attractive.

She was taken aback. “I thought, ‘What?!'” Really? She remembered, “Are you certain you have the right person?” She had never heard anyone make such a remark about her appearance before.

She was beginning to be recognized by this point, and people were beginning to know who she was—Jennifer Garner.

The same individual who used to walk to auditions because she couldn’t afford the train and wear heavy theatrical makeup offstage was suddenly getting regular gigs. But little had changed in her daily routine. She said that she didn’t know how to use her high-quality makeup tools.

“If I used it, I would just look bruised,” she once remarked. Her prior makeup-related misadventures have continued to be the subject of self-deprecating jokes. She was questioned about the worst beauty advice she had ever received during an appearance on the “Lipstick on the Rim” podcast in 2024.

“I wasn’t required to get it. She remarked, “I am my own worst beauty advisor.” If you see any photos of me wearing makeup throughout my time in college, it was pancake makeup, which is what I wore for the theater. I have a white circle, and it’s very, really awful.”

Her lack of effort to be anything other than herself was what distinguished her in a field that is dominated by beauty. Apart from her red carpet appearances, she wore jeans, sneakers, and a sweater or gym attire every day.

She not only acted but also actively contributed to the expansion of the cold-pressed organic food firm Once Upon a Farm, which she co-founded. Additionally, she dedicated herself to advocacy work with Save the Children, regularly traveling to her home state to engage with the local population.

Garner was calm and private despite personal difficulties, such as a well-publicized divorce, refusing to rely on sensationalism or public sympathy. Rather, she concentrated on her job, raising her kids, and helping out where she could.

She posted a brief remembrance of her father, who died in early 2024, calling him a man of faith and a kind, devoted father. “We appreciate Dad’s calm strength and kind disposition. She added, “For the way he created the role of all-in, ever-patient girl dad and for the way he teased with a mischievous smile.”

She went on to say, “There is so much to say about my dad,” “My sisters and I will never be done talking about how wonderful he was, so bear with us— but for today, I share these memories with my appreciation for the kind and brilliant man, father, and grandfather he was, as well as the loving legacy he left behind.”

Her adventure has distinguished her at 53. And by remaining the same, she gained respect in a society that frequently prizes beauty. Her journey was molded by perseverance, self-control, and a refusal to fake, from traveling miles to auditions and folding shirts backstage to juggling work and family obligations.

She became famous by remaining true to who she was and not by trying to fit in. She may have once questioned whether or not people would find her attractive, but now she is respected not only for her work but also for her stability, her morals, and the strength that has always been there.