My Dad Invited My Brother and Me to His Wedding to the Woman He Cheated on Our Mom With – He Had No Idea He’d Regret It Soon
Hearing my dad call to bring my brother and me to his wedding, I automatically worried it would be sad to watch him marry the person who split the family. I was totally surprised to find out my brother was planning a sweet surprise for their special day.
I am Tessa.
Right now, I’m 25, have a job in marketing and I’m learning how to be grown up when your childhood ends too fast.
There is a little brother named Owen who is 12 at home.
He was always a cheerful and kind boy, no question about it. Someone who is friendly to people who bring them packages and who gets emotional when their favorite characters get hurt.
Evan used to show me his art pieces, made in class and say, “Tessa, I created this for Mom!”
He spent a lot of time making his mother Mother’s Day cards with glitter and stickers, writing sweet messages for her such as “You’re the best mom in the universe”.
As a result of what happened in our family, I saw that caring and compassion fade in me. Innocence seemed to leave his character.
Evan, our dad, was unfaithful to our mom by seeing a woman from his job. Her name was Dana Scully. Dana, the woman with the polar-white smile, working in his accounting company, with always perfect hair. My mom discovered it when she got home from shopping before dinner on a Thursday.
She still had dirt on her hands from repotting the small plant which was from Home Depot. She stepped into the living room planning to surprise Dad by making his favorite meal.
Instead of being in the bedroom, I found her and Dana lying on the couch.
I can’t forget how she dropped the plant. Exactly like she’d had the wound. The pot made out of ceramic fell and shattered on the hardwood and she simply stood there looking.
I can explain everything, Linda, Dad said and stood up to button his shirt.
Mom did not say anything in response. She looked back and went right toward their bedroom.
What happened after that was much uglier and more confusing than anything in a movie. Cries, begging and desperate shouts were heard constantly during those weeks. I would walk into the house from work and usually see Mom with a heap of tissues, with her eyes swollen and tears still falling.
Have you heard that… She put that question to me one time. Did you notice anything I did not?
I found out too late, but I wished I had sooner. I should have tried to tell her about it.
For many weeks after she discovered it, my mother thought she could still fix everything. She decided to go to counseling alone since Dad wouldn’t come with her.
She got on her knees beside their bed every evening, just like we used to when Owen and I were little. She told him in detail what they both meant to each other and how they should face any problems side by side.
One night while folding his clothes she said to me, “It’s been 22 years, Tessa.” We went through college as a couple. That experience has to make an impact on him for some reason.
This did not happen, however.
Within three weeks of serving Mom the divorce papers, Dad started living with Dana. That quickly, the relationship ended it, just erasing 22 years of their friendship.
I remember Owen quietly saying in our room that very first night after Dad left, “Does Dad love her more than he loves us?”
I was unable to give an explanation. How can you tell a 12-year-old that sometimes adults put themselves first which can cause problems for everyone else?
Owen, he loves us very much. I said to myself, though it wasn’t certain, “He just doesn’t understand things properly right now.”
If I’m good, isn’t it normal for dads to decide to live with us?
I put my arms around him and touched his forehead with a kiss. I am not sure, my friend. I am not sure at all.
Mom worked hard to look strong for us, though I clearly saw how much she was suffering in her mind. In three months, she lost 20 pounds by eating just crackers and tea most of the time. All it took to make her cry was a commercial about families, coming across Dad’s old mug or she couldn’t find the lid to a container.
After a year of being divorced, a wedding announcement shows up out of nowhere. Dad rings me up in the evening on Tuesdays with the same energy as if we were sitting down for coffee together.
“Hey, sweetheart! How has your work day been?”
“Fine, Dad. What’s up?”
I wanted to tell you Dana and I are going to be married next month. The plan is to have the ceremony right in her sister’s backyard. A basic selection that’s easy to use and quite functional. Please ask Owen to take part with you in the conversation. I would be very happy if my children could take part in our celebrations.
In the kitchen, phone in my hand, I wanted to burst out in laughter or shout out loud. Or both.
I told them, “You want us to be at your wedding.”
“Of course! You are my kids. This is a fresh start for everyone and I hope you want to join us.”
A change in the story. So I felt like our family was just his first try and he could make it better later.
I told them that I would consider it.
“Great! I will send you the instruction. I love you, Tess.
He had already hung up when my response came in.
At first, Owen absolutely refused every time I mentioned going.
According to him, even a meeting with the Pope wouldn’t make him leave his video game. I am not going to be there when Dad wed the woman who broke our family apart.
However, once our grandparents joined the conversation things got complicated. Grandpa and Grandma Thurman took turns to talk separately with us about being united and forgiving one another.
Grandma told me, “Keeping anger is only harmful for you.” He did not always do things right, but he remains your father. Being there would be responsible.”
Grandpa suggested considering what everyone in the family is thinking. Should people think your children are vindictive and miserable?
Even though he kept getting pressured by his relatives and reminded that “the bigger person” should, he gave in after some days.
“Okay,” he said simply. I agree to go to the dumb wedding.
There was a quality in his voice that made me slightly uneasy. I had never seen that sort of determination in anyone before.
On the morning of his wedding, Owen was very quiet. I didn’t find anger or frustration coming off them like I thought. Just quiet.
He put on his navy button-down shirt and khakis by himself, without anybody needing to remind him.
Is everything all right with you? I slipped on my earrings while I was asking.
“Yeah. He said he was fine, though he refused to make eye contact.
Red flags showed themselves two weeks before the wedding, especially when he entered my room with his iPad in hand.
Will you please go to Amazon and order something I need? I haven’t created an account yet.”
What is it that we have in front of us? I didn’t pay much attention when I asked. I had a lot of work emails to deal with.
He showed me what was on the screen. Itching powder. One of the weird gifts you find in novelty stores. Kinds of insects that make your skin itch or prod if they brush up against you.
Did you try to make a joke out of your friends at school? I asked.
He shrugged. “Yeah. For example, that kind of thing.
I wish I had asked him more about the problem. I wish I could have been thinking about why my serious little brother was suddenly asking for prank supplies.
But I was not focused and it sounded okay to me.
I clicked on “Buy Now” right away without really thinking, since the product interested me.
I’m not ignorant by any means. Looking at it now, I had this feeling. I have a very strong sense of what he could be doing next. Even so, I didn’t say I didn’t want to. I didn’t make him tell me. I let him do as he wanted.
Why?
Being unable to watch my mother’s pain after the divorce destroyed me.
It was my wish to make someone experience even a little bit of her humiliation and pain.
Dana asked us to be at her sister’s house before the wedding and we got there earlier than we planned.
In a white robe, Dana was walking around in the backyard, playfully laughing with her attendants and supervising the arrangements with the wedding planner. She appeared happy and very comfortable on stage.
Dad noticed us straight away and approached with a big smile.
There I see my wonderful children! He said we did not look like children anymore and stubbornly hugged us in an awkward way.
I’m happy you guys came. That is so important to me.”
Owen let his eyes meet his father’s and said, “We won’t miss it, Dad.
I could detect something in the way he spoke. He was totally unable to see the lack of authenticity in our TV life.
About 60 minutes before the ceremony, Owen found Dana applying her makeup. He had a garment bag in one hand and his most innocent smile on his face.
Dana, he smiled, “Hi.” You’re really beautiful today.
She flashed a huge grin at him. Many thanks to you, Owen! It’s very kind of you to say that.
May I put your jacket away for you, to avoid it getting wrinkled? Seeing it on the chair, I thought it could get all dirty so I put it away.
Dana looked across at the white wedding jacket lying over a chair on the patio. Oh, you did such a kind thing. Yes, please. You are so good at giving a helping hand.”
While she was checking the messages from the photographer, she gave him the jacket.
“I will keep it very safe,” answered Owen with a smile.
He went into the house for five minutes. When Shepherd came back, he did not have his weapon and he was calmer than usual.
“We are all ready,” was his reply to Dana. The object is secured safely.
He was called an angel and she stroked his hair.
The opening for the ceremony was scheduled for 4 p.m. At 3:30 p.m., people started finding their seats in the backyard which was beautifully decorated. She went to the room to finish getting dressed in her special outfit.
Owen was motionless beside me near the front and he had his hands held together, as if we were in church.
“You good?” I whispered.
His chin moved down as he said the word. “I’m good.”
Music began and at that moment Dana appeared on the stage looking completely stunning.
Her walk down the aisle showed how comfortable she was, as she smiled to all the people attending. My father stood up there looking as if he had lucked into a giant prize.
The officiant started by saying things in generic terms about starting a new life and what love means.
Traditionally, the ceremony lasts about three minutes, but then something started to change around that point.
Something seemed to change about three minutes after the ceremony began.
Dana began with just a little bit of twitchiness. She scratched her left arm the first time and then she scratched it again. But then, instead, she started fixing her collar. Her face was no longer quite so radiant as before.
Just as they got to the vows, she seemed very uncomfortable. She kept pulling on the neck of her jacket, scratched her arms and moved her weight from one foot to another.
Do you, Dana Michelle, promise that Evan Robert would be your husband according to law? the person in charge asked.
She answered simply, “I do,” but she looked off somewhere in the distance. She stretched out to scratch the back of her neck and the back of both shoulders.
People who were there saw this happening. My aunt leaned across to her husband and said quietly, “Is it an allergy?”
Owen was very still as he stayed beside me. Having no expression and continuing to hold his hands in his lap. He showed no sign of pleasure or glee. He stood there simply watching.
Things for Dana soon went from tension to actual discomfort.
She was now scratching every part of her body and her face was getting flushed.
Are you all right, my dear? He whispered, speaking outside of the lines of the script.
“I… It appears to me that something is wrong, Dana added. I am feeling like my skin is burning.
He she struggled to get off her shoulders. I’m sorry, I have to..
Right before the ceremony was finished, Dana fled to the house, with the bridesmaids following her.
People in the background muttered among themselves. People in the room were confused and looked each other over to understand what had gone on.
Fifteen minutes after that, Dana came out of the house wearing another set of clothes.
Her dress was beige and looked like it had been taken from the closest of a friend. Her hair was a mess, her makeup was smudged and her skin was still red and looked uncomfortable.
I’m sorry to tell you all, but I can’t do it this morning.” There was a reaction within me to something. We can keep going with the rest!”
The feeling in the room went completely away. Half the audience were still slowly talking to one another. The photographer was looking puzzled. The person getting married actually seemed to rattle the officiant as he tried to get the ceremony started again.
After that, the ceremony moved ahead swiftly and oddly.
Dad walked me aside during the reception close to the dessert table.
Do you have any thought about what the incident was about, Tessa? Dana’s skin looked very red, as if she had been burned. She has never been allergic to medicine before.”
I shrugged, raised my cup and took a sip of my drink. It could be that polyester is causing her allergy. It could also be that whoever cleaned the jacket used a different laundry detergent?
I never actually lied in what I said. I let him discover the lessons by himself.
He said, “That’s a funny thing to hear,” and shook his head in surprise. It occurred on the most perfect of days.
I went along with his reasoning. This is a really unfortunate time for this to have happened.
While in the car heading home, Owen silently sat in the passenger seat and stared outside.
He ended by telling me, “She didn’t sob, even after I had done it.”
Let me know what you are saying.
Dana did not shed any tears. Although she felt embarrassed and it was difficult, she did not cry. Mom grieved and cried for a very long time.
But she won’t forget how she was cared for today. Considering her wedding, she will feel embarrassed and remember being completely out of control. Just as she remembers joining them the first time.
I was shocked at that instant to see that 12-year-old sibling had a grasp of justice beyond my expectations. He didn’t want to cause Dana grief or make her very sad. He hoped she would at least know what it was like to feel as badly as our mother.
Do you feel sorry about that?” I made the inquiry with him.
Owen spent some time considering the question. “No. I sense that the separation isn’t as much in your mind right now.
These days, a fortnight later, he refuses to speak with us. He believes we made his little league experience into the worst it could be.
Dana’s family accuses us of being evil children and suggests we go for therapy. While our grandparents think we must apologize sincerely and that our actions have made the family unpleasant.
But I haven’t said I’m sorry to you yet. No, I am not doing that myself.
I didn’t ever plan what Owen ended up doing. I did not sprinkle the powder or put it into Dana’s jacket. I also didn’t do anything to stop it when I should have.
It happened all by itself.
Given that everyone who was supposed to help mother back then ignored, brushed off and forgot her pain, I don’t consider that a problem.
Perhaps this makes me someone who is terribly lacking in character. Maybe I should have acted as the older sibling and prevented my brother from trying to get justice.
Even after I consider Mom sobbing without Dad, I am unable to feel guilty myself.
Did I do something wrong by not interfering with Owen? I don’t have an answer to that. I’m not regretting what I did, either.
Enjoyed that? Give this one a read too: My mom told me no one had come from Jeff’s family and it made me feel worried. We were getting married on that day. There was no reason for anything to go wrong. But even so, someone took time to ensure it happened that way.
