4 Real-Life Stories about Dads Who Refused to Pay for Their Kids’ Weddings

When Reddit users decided not to pay for their children’s weddings, they had to seek objective opinion from strangers. Some withdrew because their daughters had excluded them from significant portions of the weddings, while others had other children not allowed to attend.

The four Reddit tales that follow illustrate the kinds of family dynamics that can lead to decision-makers who are paying for weddings to reconsider. One father disclosed that, although treating her gay brothers as equals in other contexts, his daughter, the bride, had excluded them from her wedding.

Stepdad finances his stepson’s wedding but isn’t present at the ceremony
On June 2, 2013, a guy posted a story that had been bothering him a lot as his stepdaughter’s wedding date drew near on Reddit’s “Off My Chest” topic. The original poster (OP) stated that August 3 was the planned wedding date for his stepdaughter.

The bride-to-be and her mother have spent the last six months immersed in wedding preparations, according to a Reddit member. He explained how he felt about the mother of his daughter by saying:

“I say her mother because we aren’t married, though we’ve lived together for 10 years.”

Then, OP disclosed the significant financial assistance he provided to his stepdaughter, which included paying for her $40,000 college tuition even though she was enrolled in a state school. In order to make her drive to and from college easier, he also purchased a car.

More than anything, he was troubled by the fact that his stepdaughter did not treat him the same way that her real father did. OP clarified that although his stepdaughter’s biological mom occasionally reappeared and vanished from her life, she continued to show him a great deal of love.
The biological father’s stepdaughter still loved and desired him in her life, even though he didn’t provide financial assistance or child support. Additionally, OP mentioned that the biological father of his stepdaughter had a tendency of promising her things and then disappearing, which would always hurt her heart.

The fact that the wedding location could only hold 250 guests made OP more and more irate as the big day approached. A list of twenty persons he wanted to invite was given, in light of his significant monetary contribution to the event.
According to OP, he notified his guests about their invites and encouraged them to save the date after receiving assurances that there wouldn’t be a problem and that everything would be taken care of. Nevertheless, one of his buddies who was on the guest list said he hadn’t received an invitation when they ran into one other at the golf course.

Rather, all the guest got was an announcement card without OP’s name on it. The announcement listed the bride’s biological parents but notably left him out, which led to a heated dispute between OP and the mother of his stepdaughter.

He was shocked to learn that, because to capacity restrictions, not a single person on his list was invited. The response from his partner, “250 people is very tight,” did not ease his ire. Since the crucial people in his life had already been offended and the damage had already been done, OP felt helpless.

At a Sunday dinner with the prospective in-laws, his stepdaughter revealed a surprise guest—her “Real Dad.” This announcement only served to heighten the tension. She excitedly announced that her mom would be there to marry her.
Driven by rage and a sense of being belittled, OP paused to gather his thoughts. After he did, he got up from the chair and said he would want to make a toast. He talked about how he had been a part of the family for ten years and how the bride and groom had brought him to some realisation recently.

The stepfather clarified that he had learned from the couple that his place in the family wasn’t what he had thought it was. He talked about how he used to think of himself as someone who commanded respect, an authoritative figure, and someone who was needed for help when things became tough.
But he eventually realised that he had been reduced to nothing more than a resource, largely appreciated for financial assistance. According to OP, he gave up his financial position to his stepdaughter’s biological father after being displaced as the host.

He then raised a glass to the happy couple and their decision. There were groans and whispers among the visitors, but nobody came up to OP. He ended up spending the night in his home office after a furious disagreement with his fiancée, who accused him of being conceited.

That same evening, the Redditor moved the wedding funds out of his joint account with his partner. He requested refunds from the merchants over the phone in the morning. By coincidence, he opened the bride’s wedding planner and saw that the father-daughter dance portion was tailored to the preferences of the biological father.

The Reddit member asked his girlfriend and the bride when they could move out since he felt like they never really cared. He provided an update, saying that the bride and his girlfriend moved out and moved in with the groom. Additionally, OP appreciated and thanked the Reddit community for the unwavering support he received.

He claimed that in an effort to include the groom’s parents, the wedding preparations were trimmed back. But shortly after the incident, his girlfriend sought to use their joint account to make a cheque for herself, further severing ties with him. He expressed gratitude to everyone for their support and felt a sense of closure despite everything.

The bride’s father withdraws his payment for the wedding when her daughter disparages her gay brothers.

A Reddit member posted about his dilemma over his daughter Casey, who was scheduled to wed her fiance Max in the upcoming winter. Before becoming engaged, the couple had been dating for about four years. According to the 56-year-old, he is the father of five kids in total.

In addition to Casey, he is the father of two sons, Alex, 31, and Tom, 34, as well as the eldest and youngest daughter. It fell to Casey to cover the costs as his wedding was approaching. According to OP, the groom’s family cannot afford to pay for the wedding and fly to attend at the same time because they live abroad due to currency exchange rates.

Because all that was important to the Redditor was his daughter’s happiness, he had no trouble paying for the wedding. He did, however, find out the surprising circumstances of the wedding when Tom, Alex, and their families paid him a visit while Casey was abroad.

The OP was startled to learn that his sons had not gotten their wedding invitations while talking about them. Thinking that Casey had not yet sent the remaining invites to the family, he did not give it any attention.

He didn’t realise anything was off until his youngest and oldest children told him they had received their invitations. When he called his sister, she verified that she had received the invites along with those from her entire family, adding that hers had arrived some time ago.

Casey’s father suspected it was related to his sons’ sexual preferences. It became evident that Tom and Alex’s sister had shunned them due to their identities when they both married men and had adoptive children.

As it turned out, the parent said that none of it made sense because, “Casey has always been close to them and supported them when they came out as gay, and non-binary, respectively.” OP called her, requesting an explanation after being disturbed by the revelations and writing:

“My daughter said that Max and his family don’t feel comfortable with couples that are not traditional and it goes against their culture, and that she hopes for my understanding.”
If that was how she felt, OP informed her he would stop paying for the wedding and withdraw from being her godfather. He maintained that Tom and Alex had done nothing wrong and should not have been left out. The Reddit poster advised Casey that her prospective in-laws should pay for her wedding if she chose to prioritise them over her own family and act accordingly.
Casey cried and hung off the phone after insulting her father. While their mother, OP’s wife, was split between the children’s circumstances, the other children supported him wholeheartedly.

The father still finds it difficult to comprehend Casey’s actions and the reason behind her decision to put Max’s family over her own. He mentioned that she was the one who facilitated her brothers’ disclosure and explanation of everything to him.

Casey’s father received a lot of support and sympathy from Reddit members. They gave him credit for defending his other kids. They supported him when his daughter was labelled a bigot for her opinions.

Groom’s father issues a warning to his son, threatening not to pay for his wedding.
On July 2, 2023, a man shared his story in Reddit’s “AITA” topic after he was stranded in an odd circumstance. Prior to diving into the main narrative, OP briefly discussed his family. He said he was an ex-military officer who had served his country for roughly five years.
When OP enlisted in the military, his kid Karter was just five years old, but he and his spouse had already broken up. But the Redditor managed to maintain a bond with his son even after getting divorced, remembering:

“I always made every effort to be a good dad and spend time with him while on leave.”

The parent never passed up the chance to spend time with Karter after his service was over. The youngster grew up with a strong relationship with his father as a result. But the man’s expectations were not realised. His ex-wife remarried a man called Steven not long after their divorce, and the two grew close to Karter.

Karter and his father eventually had a disagreement as a result of Steven’s kind treatment of his stepson. Until his son turned 23 and made the decision to wed his fiance Clark, nothing concerned OP. Karter turned to his biological father for financial support for his wedding because his stepfather and mother were unable to provide.
Although OP was fine with paying for his son’s wedding, he was not happy with what transpired next. He said, “Come to find out yesterday that Karter wants both me and Steven to walk him down the aisle.” He felt he should have been the one to escort his son down the aisle by himself, thus hearing of his son’s preparations pained him. He believed he had the right to walk with his son because he was covering the cost of the wedding and was always there for Karter, saying:

“We got into a huge fight about this morning, and I told him that I wouldn’t pay for the wedding if Steven walks him down the aisle.”
Members of OP’s family had a different take on his issue. While his father believed he made the correct decision and should make sure that only he escorted his son down the aisle, his ex-wife said he was being irrational and selfish.

He and his 48-year-old brother have a long-standing rivalry that began when he was 20 years old.
OP felt perplexed after seeing his family’s reaction and posted on Reddit to inquire if he was at fault. While some supported the man’s ex-wife and believed he should have paid for his son’s wedding, others supported him and felt his choice was the right one.

The groom’s father withdraws from covering the cost of the wedding following his daughter’s defection
A parent shared on Reddit about a difficult circumstance that might have ruined his connection with his daughter. In the spring, the 46-year-old disclosed, his daughter was getting married. He clarified that it was customary for each family to pay half of the wedding expenses in his culture.

But he felt his boundaries were being broken when his daughter announced she would be inviting his brother, with whom he had a long-standing rivalry. He learned that his daughter had been hanging out with him and his wife for the last four years, in addition to the fact that she wanted his brother to be at her wedding.

His daughter requested that her cousin serve as the flower girl as well. The father became enraged at hearing his daughter’s remarks. She didn’t seem to care about his limits or sentiments, in his opinion. OP made the decision to stand his ground and informed her that he would not be covering the costs of the wedding or attending it in any way.
Outraged, she said he was making her wedding all about himself. When OP’s daughter begged him to move on from the past, he refused to give in and forced her to choose between her uncle and him. The entire family began to turn against him.

He received a call from his ex-wife, who was furious with him for offending their daughter. Additionally, OP’s parents contacted and begged him not to disappoint his daughter, but he chose to ignore them. Additionally, his girlfriend attempted to reassure him and persuade him to reconsider her choice. She even warned him that if he called off the wedding, it might sour his connection with his daughter.
OP was not giving up, though. Thinking about it, he wondered if it was improper to call off his daughter’s wedding in order to draw attention to the fact that a boundary had been broken, and he wanted his feelings to be acknowledged. He and his 48-year-old brother have a long-standing rivalry that began when he was 20 years old.

After his then-girlfriend cheated on him with his brother, they were married. He made the heartbreaking decision to never again be in the same room as his brother. He also begged his family to support him in maintaining his distance, but they never ignored him.
That implied that he would immediately remove himself from whatever plans his parents had to invite him and his brother over. Even though OP’s family turned against him, a lot of people were aware of his background. Considering how her father felt, several people felt that his daughter didn’t need to get in touch with his brother.

It was also said of his daughter that she made everything about his money without considering the feelings of betrayal her father would cause him. Because he wanted to fight for him so passionately, Reddit commenters said that she should have asked her uncle to pay for the wedding.